Saturday, July 23, 2011

TOUCHDOWN ATLANTIS

This should have posted early yesterday morning, but for some reason fate had other plans for me. Blogger basically gave me the bird and wouldn't lemme' post anything till now. Its 1:30 AM, Saturday 23rd, 2011.

As I stated in Twitter, there is a few things to cover concerning the Atlantis that landed back on planet earth. There are a couple of... should I say surprises, the astronauts brought back. And one of these, as you might have put together by now is the mystery ingredient to the zombie formula. You know the one I talked about a few weeks ago. Anyway, until now we had no clue on where the powder came from, that mixed with the puffer fish poison, creating mindless zombies.

SPACE. The powder came from space. This explains... somewhat, the silver discs in the zombie fields. The special satellites that NASA and the ASMZ are using, pin pointing different positions on the globe the governments need the formula.


Has NASA really been trafficking space dust for all these years to make zombies? I'm putting that in my back pocket and circling around later to touch on that.

The next thing I wanted to hit was the 5 hot chicks turn zombie. This is actually a pretty funny story. I was riding my bike home from work the other night. I pulled up to a light when this dude pulled up next to me. He had passengers. 5 chicks. Texting or tweeting or what ever they were doing, they weren't paying attention at all. The dude motions for me to rev my engine, so I did... Then he just smiled oddly and stuck his hand back in the car, grabbed a beer and raised it up in the air. Then for some reason the 5 chicks started arguing about something, not sure what but I could clearly hear it over my bike. Two chicks in the back noticed that the driver was raising his beer to me and they stuck their 'improper' finger out for me to see. Then, the light turned green.

At the next light, I learned what they were arguing about. One of the girls had been bitten and started thrashing around. The light turned green and we both took off again, this time he was just ahead of me. I could see the struggle in the back seat amongst the girls. Fitting 5 chicks in a seat made for 3 isn't a good idea, especially when one turns zombie! The lights on the road were yellow but I could still see the mayhem going on as if it were mid day. Blood splattered the back windshield as the girls one by one turned zombie. With out the brains (no pun intended) to get out of the car, they just started devouring themselves.

I passed the car as it started to slow. I stopped at the next light and watched the car slowly, slowly come toward me, rubbing its tires on the curb. Right through the light I watched it. The driver was missing a huge chunk of his neck and cheek. He might be a lucky one and die without having to turn zombie. Only one can hope though right? His car ended up on the side of the road, rocking from left to right underneath a very pale yellow street light. Maybe if he hadn't of been drinking he would've had the common sense to get out when you have 5 drunk chicks in your car. Live and learn though right?!?

Moving on.

With the shuttle back, the astronauts are getting the praise they deserve for doing what they did... or whatever we're told they did. My neighborhood is pissed because Obama shut down the space program. People will loose their jobs, some will lose their homes or worse their ability to protect themselves against the growing population of 'faster' zombies. The GYPSY GROUP has been calling my house and leaving messages, telling me something about the PLANET? I haven't put together what they are talking about, but they said very quickly that the nauts (astronauts) have the 'KEY'.

Hopefully I can get another interview with the GYPSY GROUP soon enough so they can explain themselves. Another thing they said in haste was something about NIBURU and someone called ANUNNAKI? They wrapped it up by saying quite clear and slowly, "EDDIE, THE COORDINATES YOU REVEALED TO THE WORLD THROUGH TWITTER SHOWS THE TRIANGLE. WE HAVE PROOF THAT BILDERBERG IS BEHIND THE PLANET. BEFORE MODERN MAN WAS CONCEIVED, BEFORE MODERN MAN WAS CONCEIVED!!"

Really though, I wish they wouldn't yell on my answering machine like that. It distorts and gets all fuzzy. I'm more confused now than ever before. I wish the Nauts could explain the space powder to the world. Explain why they have been trafficking the stuff back since the beginning. Why do we even need zombies? Is population control really mandatory? I mean, before in the days where people would die of old age, crime, sickness.... Do we absolutely need to be killed off by secret societies?

My brain hurts thinking about it. Soon I'll have more info. Hopefully the GYPSY GROUP will give me that interview like they promised and I'll air it here first. I'll announce it on twitter first for sure. @eddierotten

NIBURU, ANUNNAKI, and something about a planet... hmm. That's a thinker.

I'm hot though, my a/c guy is coming out tomorrow to fix it. Hopefully he will come prepared to fight some zombs cause my neighborhood is packed full of em'. I feel like a chili pepper packed in a tin of Parana sardines! 

Oh, and for all the new readers from Saudi Arabia. Marhaban.

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