Saturday, May 28, 2011

5.28.2011 NASA ZOMBIES

Ok. As I said the other day, two of my sons friends, JOSH and RUBEN volunteered to sneak into NASA to try to find clues leading towards zombie farms and possibly discover a zombie farm 'inside' NASA.

What they found was much more juicy!

At night, NASA guards are every where, so JOSH and RUBEN entered through the storm drain tunnels just as me and my wife wanted to do 5 months ago when this whole zombie thing got out of control. Well, when they returned from NASA, beaten and exhausted... they relayed this short story to us.

At the end of Tunnel B, they had to pick a lock to gain access to the entire underground of NASA. (I knew there had to be something down there) They told us they heard zombies moaning and shuffling around the whole time, but didn't see any zombies until they made their way out.

As they came to the first corner, RUBEN leaned out and took a look. He saw 3 men, CANARIES, wearing the now notorious yellow outfits. They were all leaning over a tub filled with water. It was dark and they were talking amongst themselves but RUBEN said it was too hard to make out. JOSH snapped his fingers and got the attention of the CANARY soldiers and out of curiosity, they investigated.

As the three CANARIES rounded the corner, JOSH punched the first one directly in the nose and knocked him out. RUBEN punched the knee of then next CANARY and dropped him hard, quickly covering his mouth till he passed out. The third ran off too quickly for them to attack him. Now their job got hard because of time. Other soldiers would be on their way, and zombies too if they weren't careful.

JOSH & RUBEN ran up to the tub of water where the other men had been standing, and noticed odd shaped fish in the tub. JOSH said, "PUFFER FISH". What are puffer fish doing under the ground at NASA?  They heard the zombie moans getting closer.

Over to the right was a table with a single lamp exposing some documents that they quickly grabbed and stuffed in their pockets. There was a small booklet with dates and times they grabbed and most importantly a really sweet gun of some sort. I still haven't been able to figure it out.

They didn't see much but were afraid to stay much longer. After all... it was the last week of school and their parents didn't know where they were. This was a secret mission. On the way out they stepped over the CANARIES they knocked out and started down the long hallway towards the gate leading to the man hole. Half way down the hall they saw the shadows of the flesh eaters behind them. They turned around to see 50 or more zombies hungry for meat. JOSH & RUBEN reported that each and every one of the zombies, were RUNNERS.

My worst nightmare had come true. RUNNERS in Houston could mean the end to us all. As they got to the stairs that led up and outside to fresh air, RUBEN climbed first. They were out of time. The zombies were upon them. JOSH open fired the semi-automatic he brought along. One by one the zombies fell with his accuracy. JOSH then too started climbing. They were fast at their feet. RUBEN climbed with one hand and pulled a 6 shot revolver from his back belt and cracked off 6 rounds, dropping 6 zombies. All that time on BLACK OPS payed off for both JOSH & RUBEN.

Now, out of the hole.... they ran. They ran and ran as the NASA spot lights came on and fired down like laser beams on the fields below. They ran to the first section of trees and caught their breath while they checked to make sure they had all their gear and findings. But again, the zombies came...

From behind trees they came lunging at JOSH & RUBEN. RUBEN was out of bullets so he ran up and punched a zombie square in the face dropping it like a sack of potatoes. JOSH had a fresh magazine loaded and ready to go for the 4 zombies stumbling their way from behind the fog.

With all the noise they were making, the NASA siren sounded loudly through the night. JOSH & RUBEN made their way to the road where my wife was approaching in the jeep. With the top down and doors off, they jumped into the moving vehicle. Wandering road zombies were trampled in the jeeps escape, and all personnel and info was safe.

Back at the house, JOSH & RUBEN cleaned up and reported: RUNNERS, PUFFER FISH, CANARIES. All of which were very disturbing to me. Again I questioned... why the hell were there Puffer Fish in the damp underground tunnels of NASA?

I will soon be able to put pieces together as I go through these documents and files.. I will also report on this odd contraption. It looks to be a weapon of some sort but I don't
 know what???

JOSH & RUBEN are home in their beds now. RUBENS' mom called and told me she knew the whole time, but he's still grounded. JOSHS' dad also called and wants to come over in the morning for a chat. He's probably pissed. He's a big dude too. I'll take your prayers if you dont mind.

And to the other ZOMBIE FIGHTERS that want to make a difference out there... as far as ZOMBIES are concerned..  KILL EM' IF YOU GOT EM'

EDDIE ROTTEN OUT

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